In honor of Father’s Day, we asked a few CUW employees to submit their favorite Dad Jokes.

It’s a day to celebrate the dads in your life. And what better way to let fathers shine on their special day than to share a few jokes from their namesake genre?

Even better, we’ve solicited Dad Jokes straight from the source. Here are some favorites from a few CUW employees who are fathers.

Steve Taylor

Vice President of Student Life

What’s red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

What’s green and has wheels?

Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Adam Paape

Assistant Dean of School of Education

I saw my math teacher with a piece of graph paper yesterday.

He must be plotting something!

David Hengst

Associate Director of Graduate Admission

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

Noideer (Pronounced: No idea’r)

Scott Van Ornum

Professor of Chemistry

Dr. Van Ornum offers a joke that combines nods to his preferred pen color to use in class and his family pets, three beloved Ragdoll cats.

What is a Ragdoll cat’s favorite color?


Chris Brandt

Director, Business Intelligence

Cassette tapes had a side A and a side B.

It was only natural that the successor was the “CD”!

When I was young, I was poor.

After many years of hard work, I am no longer young.

Why is gravity so cheap?

It’s MASS produced!

What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?

A receding HARE line!

Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?

They got in a fight over COVID masking in 2021!

The adjective for “metal” is “metallic.”

But for “iron” it’s “ironic.”

Want in?

Dads can be students, too! Our post-traditional programs offer flexibility so that you don’t have to sacrifice those precious life moments while pursuing your degree. See what CUW has to offer!